Saturday, January 12, 2013

The Ultimate Blow-out: Chicken Vs. Turkey!

I'm from Kansas and apparently quite a dumb Kansan at that.

You'd think I'd know the distinction between a turkey and a chicken since I live in the midwest. You'd be wrong. I mean, okay, everything I taste is formulated around the ground zero of chicken. It's like six degrees of Kevin Bacon, minus the actor, minus the bacon, add the chicken. Very complex equation (but if you add a side of bacon in again, you might have something. Hold the Kevin.).

So, my wife brings home a turkey, cooks it up. Tastes great. I like turkey "drumsticks." Anyway, I've eaten two of the drumsticks outta' the refrigerator and then I find another. And yet another. From the same turkey!  THE SAME TURKEY, YOU GUYS! Four drumsticks!


Did this turkey grow up by a chemical waste plant or something? I asked my wife why our turkey has four legs. After much eye-rolling, pantomiming and frustration, I sorta' intuited the answer.

I guess the turkey is the stronger of our fowl brethren with buffed-up, muscular upper arms that I mistook for bonus drumsticks. And it gets even stranger. The turkey apparently has many more bones in its legs than chickens do. New one on me! Why in the world would a turkey have more bones in its legs then a chicken? Do they bully the barnyard? Are they bad-ass fowls with thighs of thunder? Femurs of fury?

Edible nature sure can be kooky.


  1. First of all ... "It's like six degrees of Kevin Bacon, minus the actor, minus the bacon, add the chicken." LOL! That's awesome.

    Secondly, um, the bonus drumsticks do not sound normal to me. I vote mutation.

  2. Gah! What have I eaten, Dorothy, WHAT HAVE I EATEN? I'll let you all know if I start glowing in my sleep or something.

  3. Fowl play was easy for me because I took the cowardly custard way out and bought boned, stuffed, chicken and turkey rolls.

  4. hahahaha....I have no idea if that's normal! I once cooked a chicken with that bag of guts still inside.

  5. Tammy, I once wore new shoes for two days while they still had the cardboard inserts in them! Gah! No wonder they hurt!