Meeting the Pandemic Part-Way...

Well, we all want this damn pandemic over with, that's something everyone can agree upon. Everyday I hope scientists discover a vaccine so the suffering of victims and their loved ones can end. And I would hope the day-to-day fear everyone has just by going out and getting groceries comes to a conclusion.

Months ago, I thought the situation was just untenable, near hopeless. I couldn't envision a world where we had to wear masks and even those weren't fool-proof protection. But we've managed so far. Even though there are other factors (*ahem*, I'm looking at you NOTUS {the Numbskull of the United States}) going on in our world trying to thwart the best efforts to stop the spread of covid 19.

Not too long ago, I woke up for the first time in a mellow sort of acceptance state. It is what it is. Time to pull up my big boy britches and carry on, hampered by masks or whatever, let's show 'em that gung-ho, never-say-never, can-do spirit! How did this happen?

It wasn't a sudden epiphany or revelation or premonition or visitation from Joseph Smith or an anal probe by aliens or anything. No, the night before I'd had a dream, business as usual, except everyone was in masks. And the masks weren't the point of the dream, nothing out of the ordinary. The pandemic was the new normal.

People are resilient. I think everyone's tackling this pandemic on their own terms, generally going through variations of the six stages of grieving: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, day-drinking, and finally, acceptance. I know I did.

I'm not happy about it, but let's buck up and carry on. Particularly with masks.

And I applaud the creativity that's coming out in certain areas, making the most of what it is. I've seen a lotta great masks. My daughter, for instance, has taken up the doggy mask. 

My daughter's fave mask.

I've seen people accessorizing their masks to match their outfits. Creativity is soaring!

But about those masks... People, don't make me repeat myself: WEAR YOUR DAMN MASKS OVER YOUR NOSES! It doesn't do you--or us--any good if you don't. The nose allows things in and out too, you know. I don't know how many times I've seen ruddy-faced guys with masks nestled below their noses, their nostrils pluming like a charging rhinoceros with asthma. Geeze, I can't believe I even have to say this. Pretty soon, I'm gonna start hitting people up and telling them to yank it up (of course, then I'll have to yank myself up off the ground; have you SEEN the size of these guys?).

And stop listening to our wondrous president. These days Trump's preaching that people should not wear masks. Recently, NOTUS attempted to bully a reporter into taking his mask off. Trump's rage rallies are full of maskless buffoons (thanks for the thousands of new cases, commander-in-chump!), as he preens onstage like an orange peacock, calling people names and bragging about what a genius he is because he could name a lion on a cognitive test. It wasn't too long ago Trump said wearing a mask was patriotic. But whaddaya expect from a guy who changes his mind by the minute.

My preferred mask (even though my wife is afraid for me to wear it in public. I say, "Bring it, fascist cretins!" (Of course, that's before I get beat up in a grocery store.)

 

Anyway, hang in there folks. This week, I took real enlightenment from something my neighbor said--"You know, living through the pandemic may well make today's kids smarter, more adaptable, and more empathetic."." Talk about finding a silver lining. I'll take it.

Crime in our Time of Quarantine

The other day my wife tore herself away from perusing the latest electronic headlines with a gasp. "I can't believe it," she said.

Used to our president's daily cup of lunacy, I sighed, replied, "What's he done now?"

"No, for once it's not him," she said with a head shake. "Even during this pandemic, people are still shooting each other."

My wife is one of the last truly noble idealists. 

But I'm not. It all made perfect sense to me. It took all of my control not to go over there, muss up her hair, and give a Mr. Cleaver condescending "don't-worry-your-pretty-lil-head, June" chuckle over it all. (But I knew better...besides, now would be the absolute WORST time to end up in the hospital with a head concussion.)

For you see, an increase in crime during the quarantine makes perfect sense to me.

I ticked off the reasons. "Law enforcement is thinly stretched and I would imagine taking precautions themselves, thus hindering their ability to perform to the best of their abilities. Also, since most employees are at home now, places are ripe to be robbed. Crooks can just break into a bank, no security guards, no risk of getting shot. And criminals are a cowardly and superstitious lot...wait, that's "Batman"...I mean, crooks are predators."

As she thought about it, I could see her unflagging faith in the over-all goodness of humanity dim a bit. "Yeah...I suppose. And with everyone wearing masks, it's harder to identify them. Plus, they have an excuse to wear gloves, so no fingerprints."

(If my wife ever decided to go over to the dark side, she'd make a great criminal mastermind with her devious mind.)

Further case in point, recently my daughter sent me a list of scams taking advantage of the ongoing pandemic. There are stimulus check scams: these scumbags are asking for bank and personal information or even going as far as to ask for a fee! Honestly, unless your personal check has the Orange One's personal signature on it (along with an accompanying orange Dorito make-up thumb-print), it ain't kosher.

Scammers are also imitating health organizations and selling fake supplies and/or once again, asking for personal financial information. There are charity scams, hospital and provider scams, the list goes on and on.

This is truly vile and reprehensible behavior. I mean, daring and ingenious heists are one thing, but this? Taking advantage of a world's collective fear is beyond even an Ocean's 11 type of starry-eyed, Hollywood-styled romance.

I've even heard fear-mongers discussing the possibility of the United States adversaries taking advantage of our vulnerability during this time.

America's leadership isn't helping. Our commander-in-chief is so busy covering his own arse, he's creating his self-created "fake news" by making up stories daily and pointing fingers at everyone except for himself, blaming the virus on China, Democrats, Obama, journalists, and...oh, I dunno...the movie Cats, maybe?

Enough! White flag waving! 

On the other hand, I hear a lot about the generosity of many people from all walks of life. Millionaires donating scads of money (hear that, Trump?). Poor people volunteering to help. Communities coming together, supporting, and helping to bring food to the elderly. People are lining up in the streets (taking necessary precautions, natch) and applauding the brave health-care givers at the ends of grueling shifts. Likewise, this list of kindness goes on and on.

Maybe my wife has the right idea after all.

Be safe. More importantly, be kind.

(Week five of captivity and bored outta my gourd! Who woulda ever thought eating, drinking, and binging Netflix could get so boring? Somebody take Tiger King...please!)