Friday, May 1, 2015

Fun With Spoilers!

Spoiler alert! This post will be about spoilers.

Several years back, I was a regular commenter on a movie board. A topic came up about what modern blockbuster film everyone hated. I chose Titanic. For many reasons. Never bought into the love story, especially since the so-called villain's fiancee cheated on him. Leave it to me to identify with the villain. And there was way too much Leornardo DiCaprio standing on the port of the ship, yelling "I'm the king of the world!" (Is it just me, or does Leonardo resemble "E.T."?)  

Anyway, I wrote I couldn't wait for that dang boat to sink.

Some guy fires back and says, "Next time leave a spoiler alert."

Golly. (And I don't say that lightly).

Apparently history books should have prefaces pregnant with spoiler alerts according to my heckler's high standards. Guy probably should've paid more attention in school if he doesn't know the ultimate fate of the Titanic. Not like it's a well-kept secret or something.

Ridiculous. I (spoiler!) left the board after that, no moss on me.

But where and when and how do spoilers start and stop? Should I tell people ahead of time I'm walking the dog so as not to catch them unaware? Spoiler alert! Eggs for breakfast? Double spoiler! Eggs don't sit well with me anyway! Too late, you've been spoiled!

Spoiler alert! The Kardashians are still not talented! Spoiler alert! Elvis has left the building! Spoiler alert! Lima beans still, and always will, taste like regurgitated baby food!

This could go on forever, but I need to (spoiler alert!) get to bed.

In this age of everything being on display everywhere, at every moment, with every possible electronic gizmo, it's really hard to know anymore what constitutes a spoiler.

I'm the last person to spoil anyone's fun. But there's gotta' be a statute of limitations, particularly with the sinking of the Titanic. (Belated spoiler alert!).


  1. As usual, I'm sitting here laughing away. What a dummy, not knowing the Titanic sank!

  2. I wonder if the comment was written in the sarcasm font.

    1. Nope, Marva. No such luck. Guy was serious. Several people jumped to me defense, but alas, just like the Titanic, my thrill for the board had sunk.