Friday, April 24, 2015

Deal or No Deal with special guest star Mom!

Couple weeks ago I took my mom shopping. Her eyesight's failing. Better I help her than to unleash her on the roads. I don't mind doing it, keeping the world safe for you and her.

But, I swear, every small transaction is like buying a car.

At Walmart, we searched for the elusive hair spray aisle.

Now have you guys seen me? I don't have a follicle of hair on my pate. It's a world never explored. So I'm cruising the aisles looking for a product I don't understand, wouldn't know it if a display of it toppled on me. She's asking for "Dan Sassy" or something. Rows and rows of product, I can't find it. Finally, through sheer luck, we stumble upon it. She has me flag down a clerk, then ask her how much my armful of products cost. A very lengthy time of consideration ensued. But hair-products had to wait. We left empty-handed.

Next up is toilet paper. I've never given toilet paper much consideration in my life. Actually don't want to. I mean, we all use it, but I believe it's better not discussed.  But at great lengths we considered the ply, the cost, the softness factor, the color. Mom opened my eyes to a whole new world, enlightenment on a budget.

At the meat-counter, I rattled off various ground beef packages prices like an auctioneer. "$8.79, I have $8.79, how 'bout a smaller package? $6.99, we have $6.99, $6.99 going once, twice, sold to the man and his mother!"

Of course I love my mom, a wonderful person. And I'm still learning new things about her. Had no idea haggling with store clerks was a hobby of hers.

And I'll be there again in a week for our next adventure in shopping!


  1. If it makes you feel any better, I get lost in those hair care aisles in Walmart, too. Not a very fun place! Your mom's lucky she has you to help out.

  2. Too funny, Stuart! You sound like a good son. Your mom sounds like one of my relatives that I'm too fearful to name...

  3. Hahahaaha. Yeppers. That's good stuff.