Xanax Anyone?

So my wife and I were at an estate sale (side-bar: going to these is one of my wife's new hobbies; I don't enjoy trawling through dead peoples' things, but I think my purpose at these deals is to provide muscle when needed). 

We're upstairs in this house, perusing the "rare" back issues of Entertainment Weekly (c'mon, these aren't rare!), when an older guy suddenly blurts out, "Hey, anyone got a Xanax? No? How about a Valium? Klonopin, then? Adderol?"

My wife and I shoot each other a look, then mutter, "Ah, sorry, we're...um...out of those right now." Another shocked couple in the room pretty much share the same reaction.

The drug-seeking estate crawler follows up with, "No? Dayum, I got a killer headache! Wow!"

Okay, there's a lot to unpack here. First of all, whatever happened to aspirin? Isn't that still the number one go-to headache reliever? Wouldn't random strangers at an estate sale be more likely to have some aspirin on them, rather than an anxiety tranquilizer?

I dunno. Maybe I missed something. Is this line of anxiety relief drugs so over-prescribed now that they're becoming so commonplace, that it's okay to ask random strangers at an estate sale if they're packing? And is the assumption that everyone is now taking these medications (maybe so; I mean, if everyone was truly Kung Fu fighting, I suppose everyone could be popping Xanax as well.)?

Secondly, I'm pretty sure tossing a stranger a Xanax is--if not illegal--highly frowned upon. Hang on (sometimes I forget there's something out there called the "internet."). Okay, I'm back. Yep, says so right here: because Xanax is a controlled substance, the illicit distribution of it is a crime.

Yow! Either we'd stumbled into a very sneaky undercover sting targeting random Xanax-slinging strangers at estate sales, or this guy was prowling estate sale to estate sale in search of a fix. (I wonder how much luck he had with this chosen venue.) Yep, those are the only two possible choices.

You know, usually when I go to estate sales, it's in search of cool, kitschy 50's or 60's Americana or maybe even a ginormous Hawaiian shirt. I wouldn't think estate sales would be a good place to score a tranquilizer, but I could be wrong. It's happened once before.

But the next time a rando at an estate sale hits you up for a Xanax, tell him, "No! I don't illicitly carry and distribute controlled substances because I'm not licensed to do so!"

It just might keep you out of jail.

Speaking of random strangers, a bunch of them (all with dark secrets, some worse than others) convene at a Midwest Bed and Breakfast during one of the worst winter storms in recent history. Of course I'm talking about Dread and Breakfast, where checking in is a breeze, but checking out just might kill ya! Schedule that getaway right here.