Murder's On the Table!

My wife and I find ourselves embroiled in some very bizarre conversations. Take the following, for example. (And neither one of us can remember how exactly we came to this conclusion, but we just know that we did.)

"You know, divorce is not an option for us," I said one day out of the blue. "I would never divorce you."

"Hmmm," said wife. "I concur. However, murder could be a viable option."

"I wholeheartedly agree," I said while raising a very professorial finger and not even truly contemplating the underlying horror, oh, the horror of it all.

Now, of course we're joking. And I have to remember who I can tell this to and who I can't. For instance, caught up in the moment of our last anniversary celebration, we let this bombshell rip to our unsuspecting, befuddled and horrified wine-tasting hostess.

"We decided last week," said my wife, "that divorce isn't an option for us. Ever. However, murder's on the table."

Figuring I could smooth things over a bit, I added, "Yes. For all of the TV cop shows proclaim that murder is a crime of passion. Hence, it goes to figure that since we passionately love one another, murder would be the only logical outcome were things to get intensely wrong between us."

Naturally, I just made things worse. The hostess' jaw dropped and so did the glass she was polishing.

A little later, over my daughter's birthday dinner, we shared the same jovial news  as other eavesdropping diners and waitresses undoubtedly had their phones out and ready to call 911.

We do need to watch who we share this with. The Big House is not a viable option for us (although murder still is). 

While I'm on the topic of how funny murder is (hardy-har-har-har!), there are lots of larf-out-loud hijinx and antics surrounding murrrrrrder in my Zach and Zora comical mystery series. Start at the beginning with Bad Day in a Banana Hammock and you'll see just how high-larious murder can be!