The Crown Prince of Jerkdom

It's me, the crown prince of jerkdom!

Finally, I'm royalty!

Not too long ago, my wife was sleeping in incredibly late.

I went to roust her and she said--very groggily--"I keep waking up to a jerk."

Doh!

I said, "Well, I know I'm not Mr. Wonderful 24-7, but I generally am 23-7. Hmmph. You keep waking up to a jerk, indeed."

As she stared at me, waiting for wakefulness to spark, she finally said, "No, that's not what I said!"

(It's not the first time I've been called a jerk before.) "Well, what did you say?"

"I said, 'I keep waking up with a jerk.'"

Sooooo many crickets. Finally, I asked, "How is that any better?"

"You know...restlessness. I kept jerking my leg." Seeing as how I still didn't get it, she demonstrated a leg jerk.

"Ooooooooooohhhhhhh," I said.

Later the same day, she requested my aid in lifting a printer out of a box. With the job completed, she said, "I'm done with you now."

Stunned, I asked, "Is it because I'm a jerk?"

I tell you I get no respect.

Bada-boom!

While we're on the topic of really dumb comedy, nobody's dumber at comedy than lackluster stand-up comedian, Charlie Broadmoor (well, except for maybe me since I created him). Things go from crappy to sucktacular in a very quick and splatacular manner for poor Charlie when he accidentally heckles a demon during one of his routines. It's Demon with a Comb-Over available here!