Well, we watched the recent live musical TV presentation of Peter Pan and clocked out half-way through. Too many "Lost Boys" twirling and prancing around.
We tuned in for Christopher Walken, an always interesting presence, even if he does subscribe to the school of Rex Harrison speak-singing. No problem. Guy's bizarre enough, I'd watch him read a French restaurant menu.
But. And we're talking a big But. Is it weird that I found Peter Pan attractive? It's clear she's a hot gal flying around, pretending to be a boy. Not for a minute did I think she was a boy, even with all the so-called masculine posturing. Her hips don't lie.
Yet it bugs, bothers me like that itch in the middle of your back you can't reach.
This damn musical's got me thinking, never a good thing. Why is Peter Pan always portrayed by a woman? What's up with that? Is it someone's subversive idea to twist gender roles and make males uncomfortable? It's like a distaff version of a Kabuki actor.
What's that old saying? "Peter Pan's the 'boy' every male wants to be with and every female wants to be?" That doesn't seem quite right. Seems kinda messed up, in more ways than one.
I mean, if Nick Nolte were flying around on a wire in green tights, I wouldn't
find him attractive. Who would, right? (But, come to think of it, I'd
kinda' like to see that, I think).
My wife says a female portraying Peter Pan is tradition. Okay, I'll bite, but a tradition started by whom? Some transvestite Broadway producer?
(Cue scene:)
"I wanna' make 'Guys and Gals.' Bigger, bolder and better! (Spreads hands while chomping on a stogie). But, hold the gals, make it all guys, just put 'em in dresses. Brilliant! 'Guys and Guys Pretending To Be Gals!' I tell ya', we can't lose!"
Musicals are a weird beast. People don't generally break out into song while walking down the street. Well, maybe some do. But I digress.
I just never expected Peter Pan to upset my entire world-view. And, yeah, I still find whatever-her-name-is attractive, green tights and all. Especially the green tights. It's not easy being green.
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