The Doctor Is In!

I'm asking fellow writers to help me out here.

My wife teaches pharmacy at a local university. She's also an avid reader. Nothing sets her off more then when she reads a book and the author misuses pharmaceuticals. Sets her ranting and pacing the bedroom, bellowing to the ceiling about the unjust world where writers don't use drugs correctly in their tales.

Who pays for these literary crimes against nature? I do. I put in my dutiful husbandly dilligence, nod knowingly, mutter inconsequential calming words. Usually to no effect. I'm the recipient of her hellish fallout. I'm paying for your sins. It must stop.

Recently, I was lucky I used animal tranquilizers correctly in a book I wrote about dueling serial killers. Reseached it, apparently hit it right (so, FBI, if you're wondering why I researched such things, there you go. You can take me off your "list" now). Gold star for me. But beware you other writers.

So, here's the deal. And it's actually her idea. The good doctor told me to pass on to my brethren writers she's putting herself out there. She wants a world where writing and pharmacy can peacefully coexist.

We're serious here. If you have any questions regarding the usage of pharmaceutical drugs in writing, contact me, I'll pass the question on, and get back to you. I'd like nothing better because it means I'll quit being the pharmaceutical fall-out guy.

Caveat time: Gotta know you're a writer and cybernetically know you. Don't wanna' be giving out info into the wrong hands. (End of disclaimer).

(And don't feel shy to donate cash to the "Give Stuart West Peace Of Mind" fund. It's a good cause. Between us, we'll make the world a better place. Okay, this part was all my doing. Just don't tell my wife.).