Friday, May 26, 2017

President Rock

Or should that be President THE Rock?
Yep, Duane Johnson (aka "The Rock"), rassler, actor, and guy who likes to disturbingly dress in drag (a lot!) for comedic purposes, has expressed interest in running for president of the United States. (When he dresses in drag, he can be his own First Lady.)

Sure, why not? Let's do this. These days the idea of President Rock doesn't even sound all that crazy. Donald Trump threw the floodgates wide open, making it acceptable for any sorta celebrity to become POTUS. Qualifications and experience absolutely don't matter.

I'm looking forward to many interesting upcoming political campaigns. President Nicholas Cage? You betcha. He could emote his way through foreign policy. Wait, how about Liam Neeson? He's already recreated himself into an action hero, why can't he become president? He'll strong-arm his way through the Russians. God help anyone who takes hostages captive. Charlie Sheen's gonna want a piece of the action, of course. He'll run a campaign fueled by tiger blood and can solve political hot topics with the power of his brain. President Sheen is WINNING!

Kim Kardashian would make a stunning president. And to keep her in line, to keep an even keel over world events, I elect Kanye as vice-president. Based on the new TV show, Designated Survivor, I imagine Kiefer Sutherland will get quite a few write-in votes.

It's an exciting time for politics! A glorious new Camelot, filled with celebrities and stars!

When The Rock becomes president, I envision him roping off congress, taking the dissenters and annoying bill blockers to the mat! He'll piledrive the Tea Party into a corner, then chokeslam them into submission! Any pesky filibusters? Not an issue with President The Rock! He'll dropkick the stall tactic, launch into a flying moonsault, and brainbuster the filibuster into a nelson hold!

Hulk Hogan will make an excellent vice president! Why there was even (a little) talk of his running alongside Trump as his VP! 

Honestly, I can't think of any better qualifications for running for president of the US than professional wrestling!

Powerslam POTUS!

1 comment:

  1. Hmmm. Movie stars and rasslers. We have a GQ up here in Canada.