Friday, July 22, 2016

The Absolutely Craptacular Never Before Unveiled Original Deleted Ending to Godland!

A first, ladies and gents! I'm exposing myself (don't call the cops) by putting up my really bone-headed original ending to Godland, my adult suspense thriller! Seedy journalism gone wild! Hyperbole in the worst possible way!

Okay, I've settled down...

Just be thankful I didn't actually end a book this way. But do feel free to send sympathy cards. 

There's no real set-up needed, other than my surviving characters have just lived through a hellish night. 

Alright. Enough build-up. Ready? Get some Pepto-Bismol ready, 'cause you're gonna need it.

Just...just this: (Sorry, sorry, sorry...)

The bad timing of Jason entering the room couldn’t have been worse. But there he stood, face pale as chalk, eyes filled with worry. Babbling non-stop.
“There you are!” Jason yelled. 
He rushed over to Matt's bedside. “I’ve been all over this Podunk town looking for the hospital!” 
Shannon blinked at the unexpected visitor, gave him a double-take
Finally Jason noticed Shannon. “Oh, hi, honey. You must be Shannon… You okay?”
“Wait…what?” said Shannon.
Matt grimaced, awaiting the sure-to-be negative outcome.
“Um…Hi…” said Shannon. “Damn...”
“Shannon,” said Matt, "I need to explain something to  you."
“Are you gay?” his daughter asked.
Matt sighed. “Yes.” He held her tight, wouldn't let go.
To Matt’s surprise, Shannon laughed. “So…now I have two dads?”
Matt smiled back. “I suppose you do.”

And that might've been The End of my writing career had I kept this original ending. Wow, huh? Stinky. All that's missing is a laugh-track, '80's crap-com clothing and hairstyles, and a freeze-frame ala "Chips" style. 

I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I humbly apologize, I'm sorry, sorry, crap, I'm sorry....

(I'm still sorry.)

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